My Sort of Planning

Tyler asked me a few days ago what I had planned for the day. Planned? I told him that I didn't have any plans and that since Owen came I don't make plans. Owen has no schedule, making it nearly impossible to plan on anything. I never know when or if he will take a nap, where that nap will take place (only in my arms, for example), or how long that nap will last. There is simply no time to start a craft project, for example, let alone get it all out, before he wakes up from most naps. And since lately many of said naps end as soon as I set him down in his bed (or 5 minutes in), I've barely had time to start relaxing. This uncertainty makes planning on getting anything done less than tempting.

Instead I plan very little, and I feel more productive. Maybe this seems illogical, but think about it for a minute. If you want to get something done and never have the time, you just feel lame. It ruins your whole day. On the other hand, if you don't plan anything, you feel great when things do get done that you weren't planning on. So, in general, I don't really plan or I at least don't place loads of value in accomplishing said plans.

When I do plan, I try to allow for change. I alter my wording as it were. For example, rather than say, "I have to get the dishes done today," I say, "It would be nice to get the dishes done today." Maybe this seems trivial, but this simple change can make a huge difference. Consider it this way: (a) check the box I washed the dishes vs. celebration because I accomplished something extra during my day or (b) disappointment because I failed to accomplish one simple task I had planned vs. shrug it off, no big deal, I can do it later.

I have realized that I have more time than I thought. It's pretty piecemeal and therefore gets away from me because I don't use it wisely. To combat this, I make one, two, or three goals for the week--some things I want to accomplish that can be done whenever. I make sure my goals are reasonable and can be done a little at a time if necessary. I also have Tyler's help and support in accomplishing these. With his help, I can always do the task after he gets home from work and can watch Owen if need be. This week I made a craft for Valentine's Day I thought up a couple weeks ago while Tyler played with Owen. :)

Some time I've found is when I'm breastfeeding. I can stare off into space or zone out at such times, but I'm much less bored when I read instead. I feed Owen at least six times a day (he's started sleeping longer at night, not consistently, but still amazing!) and I can get a good deal of reading done at that time. It's made it easy to get some fun reading in. I'm currently reading The Grand Tour, the sequel to Sorcery and Cecilia. I also get my personal scripture study done. It's easy to make my goal of reading the Book of Mormon for at least 15 minutes each day when I do it during Owen's feedings.

Owen is also pretty laid-back and hasn't developed stranger anxiety yet, so I can invite friends over or visit people spur of the moment without him freaking out. Just yesterday I had a friend come over to scrapbook with me. Owen happened to be awake the whole time, so I just chatted while she made cards. Owen had fun smiling at her and playing with me and I got to catch up with a good friend. I've even planned another craft day for next week--maybe Owen will nap and I'll get to make something. But if not, I'll still get to chat and that is definitely worth it.

Instead of checking off a list of tasks, I enjoy anything and everything I accomplish in a day, whether it was making Owen smile and laugh, running some errands, reading a few pages from a book, organizing, doing the laundry, or doing a project. Think of it this way: every day is an adventure! You never know what you will accomplish. :) And if I spend my whole day with Owen that's great. What is more important than making my baby happy and letting him know he's loved? Caring for him is true productivity and it's definitely better than getting the dishes done.

Beds are for Sleeping

Owen has decided that he will only sleep in his bed when he's down for the night (with feedings interspersed still, of course). He does take naps, but he will not take them in his bed. Instead he insists on taking them on the couch, in my arms, or on my legs. This makes typing difficult like now since he is currently napping in my arms.

I try to put him in his bed when he's drowsy or even asleep already, but somehow he knows it is daytime and therefore only nap time. This knowledge wakes him up and he either wakes up to (a) laugh and kick in bed or (b) cry. Neither option makes me very happy. In the case of option a, I want to play with him when he's happy and awake. If I pick him up at this point though, he will quickly fall back asleep. In the case of option b, I hate it when Owen cries. It makes me so sad. I hurt inside.

I can't even handle Owen crying in bed at night. I tried to let Owen cry in bed for just a few minutes the other day. He was obviously tired, and you're "supposed to" put babies in their beds when they're drowsy so they learn to fall asleep on their own.... But I didn't last three minutes! (Not that I was going to let him cry for more than five or maybe ten minutes, he's still too little for that.) Instead, Owen fell asleep in my arms and then I put him in bed.

The irony of all this is that since I've been writing this over the past few hours, Owen has fallen asleep in his bed and it isn't even dinnertime yet. That boy has amazing senses...I think he just wanted to prove me and this post wrong.

Surgery

About a week before Christmas, Tyler had his wisdom teeth taken out. He should have gotten it done years ago, and after the surgery we both wish he had. All four of his wisdom teeth fit the description of "difficult and bony" and cost the most to get taken out (the price of each tooth removed varies based on the difficulty of removal). One of the teeth had even grown up into his sinus.

The baby and I went with Tyler to his surgery since he was going to be asleep for the ordeal and unable to drive afterward. I wasn't all that worried until I was back in Tyler's recovery room (more like a closet or cell, really). The assistant was describing how the surgery went and what I needed to make Tyler do (or make sure he didn't do) in order to recover as quickly and comfortably as possible. There was so much and I wasn't supposed to leave Tyler alone all day. I felt completely overwhelmed. How was I supposed to give Tyler the care and attention he needed and I wanted to give him and take care of Owen? To add to that, I had scheduled (stupidly since I knew Tyler was having surgery that day) time to visit with two girls from church that evening.

Tyler seemed quite with it on the drive to the pharmacy and most of the day. He also said he wasn't in much pain once he got on the medicine they prescribed him. This led to our negligence with his ice packs that day...and subsequent pain and swelling in the days thereafter.

Taking care of Tyler and Owen was not my favorite thing. It was really tiring, actually. Between feedings and medicine reminders I got very little sleep. I previously enjoyed being able to help and pamper Tyler when he was ill, now with a baby... it is not so enjoyable because I don't feel I can do all that much. But more than that, it was really stressful to take care of someone post-surgery. There are so many things to remember besides when to take medicine. Tyler wasn't supposed to suppress a sneeze, blow his nose, use a straw, prod the surgery site even with his tongue, get overtired (which means I get way overtired because we have a baby), etc. etc.

What am I going to do when my son gets his wisdom teeth out years down the road? How did my mother do it? And how did she make it look so easy? I mean, honestly, I wasn't even prepared with food Tyler could eat while he recovered and I wasn't supposed to leave him alone to even go shopping! Thank goodness we made it through that.